Embracing Personal Values
Values are incredibly important to living a fulfilling and purposeful life because they shape our personal beliefs, guide our decisions, and influence our behaviors. Values directly impact how we interact within our relationships and allow even the most “mundane” moments to become fulfilling and significant. These silent forces are the driving factors behind the ways we engage with the world around us. Exploring personal values and fully understanding their importance is crucial because when you know why you are doing something, you can continue to foster their meaning and strengthen your connection to your everyday experiences and interactions with the world around you. Values are literally at the core of what you find meaningful and important; they’re the things you stand for, the things you are passionate about, the things you live by and live for, and ultimately, they are your deepest desires for needs and wants, both inter and intrapersonally.
One of the best things about values is that you have the ability to choose what is most important to you. Although some of your core values may be heavily influenced by religion, family, culture, your social circles/society, or learned behaviors, you still have the power to shape them.
Take time to create a list of potential values that resonate with you. Here are some examples:
Integrity: Upholding honesty, trustworthiness, and moral principles in all actions and decisions.
Compassion: Showing kindness, empathy, and understanding towards others, especially those who are less fortunate or in need.
Resilience: Demonstrating perseverance, determination, and adaptability in the face of challenges or adversity.
Authenticity: Being true to oneself and others, embracing individuality, and avoiding pretense or deception.
Equality: Advocating for fairness, justice, and equal opportunities for all individuals regardless of race, gender, or socio-economic status.
Family: Prioritizing the well-being and happiness of family members, nurturing close relationships, and creating a supportive environment.
Independence: Valuing self-reliance, autonomy, and the freedom to make personal choices and pursue individual goals.
Gratitude: Appreciating the blessings and positive aspects of life, and expressing thanks for the support and kindness received from others.
Growth: Seeking continuous self-improvement, learning, and personal development in various aspects of life.
Environmentalism: Advocating for the protection of the environment, sustainability, and responsible stewardship of natural resources.
Creativity: Valuing innovation, imagination, and artistic expression, and embracing opportunities for creative exploration.
Spirituality: Nurturing a connection with a higher power, exploring existential questions, and seeking inner peace and enlightenment.
Adventure: Embracing new experiences, challenges, and opportunities for exploration and discovery.
Balance: Striving for harmony and equilibrium in various aspects of life, including work-life balance, emotional well-being, and personal relationships.
If you’re struggling to pinpoint personal core values, take time to reflect on significant moments in your life—both positive and negative. Consider experiences that brought you joy, fulfillment, and a sense of purpose, as well as times when you felt conflicted, uncomfortable, or dissatisfied. These experiences can offer valuable insights and provide clues about what is truly important to you and what you value most. Your priorities can also help reveal underlying values that influence your decision-making. Examine your priorities by taking a closer look at how you spend your time, energy, and resources. What activities, goals, or relationships do you prioritize in your life? Further your value exploration by paying close attention to your gut instincts and emotional responses when considering different values. Your intuition can often provide valuable insights into what resonates with you authentically and further help you create this list.
After you have created an initial list of values, narrow it down by prioritizing values based on their significance to you. Ask yourself which values are non-negotiable and essential to your sense of identity and well-being, and then refine and clarify. If you are still struggling to identify and narrow down personal values, utilize value assessment tools. There are various online resources and self-assessment tools available that can help you identify your core values and assist with ranking them according to their importance to you.
Your values remain fairly stable throughout your life, and when you take time to acknowledge them at different periods of your life, you may experience shifts. Some values may change in priority of importance or adapt to meet new priorities, address new limits, or align with increased boundaries and/or new expectations. Because values can change, it is incredibly important to continuously revisit them as you move through life so you can adjust or align with new shifts. What is important to you and what makes your daily experiences and relationships the most meaningful to you?
Let’s look at shifts in values through this example: Sarah has always prioritized career success and ambition above all else. She worked tirelessly to climb the corporate ladder, often sacrificing her personal life and relationships in the process. However, as she progresses in her career, she starts to feel increasingly unfulfilled and disconnected from her true passions and values. One day, Sarah's company offers her a promotion that comes with a significant salary increase but also requires her to relocate to a different city. Initially, she's excited about the opportunity for advancement and the financial rewards it brings. But as she reflects on the offer, she begins to experience a disconnect. On one hand, she is ambitious and eager for her continued success and wants to accept the promotion because it aligns with her values of career and success, which have been key to her happiness and fulfillment. However, on the other hand, she starts to question whether this promotion truly aligns with her deeper values and desires because she realizes that the relentless pursuit of success has taken a toll on her well-being and personal relationships. She realizes that she is now looking for more balance in her life and craves meaningful connections outside of work, and her personal values have started to shift. While career success was once her primary focus, she now places greater importance on holistic well-being, fulfillment, and work-life balance. Sarah finds herself conflicted and recognizes the internal struggle she is experiencing. Sarah's experience and decision should include a lot of self-reflection, which will then lead her to properly align her actions with her evolving values to help her find greater fulfillment in life and reflect on what truly matters to her in the long run.
Consider your values as a guiding compass amidst a multitude of paths or as a stabilizing anchor during turbulent times. When you neglect to ground yourself or disregard the direction your compass urges you towards, you'll encounter internal conflicts. These conflicts arise from a disparity between your actions and core values, where words and behaviors fail to align with what truly matters to you. Persisting in this disregard for self-reflection and not revisiting values can result in a disconnect with blissful happiness, a detachment within relationships or with yourself, and unsatisfied feelings with your overall everyday life experiences. However, adhering to this compass or anchoring yourself infuses your actions with your values and gives life with purpose or significance, even when discomfort arises. Your values give you reason to endure these uncomfortable sensations—pain, unease, uncertainty—within various aspects of life, because even though you may feel these uncomfortable feelings, your behaviors/actions have meaning.
Overall, understanding the importance of personal values and regularly revisiting them will empower you. You deserve to live and lead a more authentic, fulfilling life, grounded in purpose and meaning that can promote self-awareness, personal growth, resilience, emotional well-being, and further strengthen your inter and intrapersonal relationships
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